Saturday, January 31, 2009

Is it just me or is something going on with the economy?

I am worried that something actually is wrong. As a New Yorker, being impervious to a weak economy is second nature. Or so I thought.

I didn't notice anything different among my group of friends and family so I have been living life like normal.

I still enjoy taking a car service everywhere even if it's just to the corner bodega. Well, I call it a bodega, but it is actually a world class Patisserie where I like to stock up on petit fours and gold flake truffles for breakfast. My trainer doesn't mind that I indulge in such sweets since he works with me twice a day, 7 days a week. It's my little allowance.

I haven't had to curb any spending habits although I must say I was astounded to find a pair of Badgley Mischka's had dropped from $2,200 to $1,800. Due to these tough times I scooped them up instantly to help "stimulate" the economy and do my part even though I would normally not be caught dead purchasing anything with a sale tag on it.

I have even decided to start washing my own hair. Instead of going down to the spa located in my building lobby every morning for a shampoo and blow out, I am now washing my own hair in my own bathroom. Yes, yes, yes this is very pedestrian of me, but actually I have coerced the maid into giving my scalp a good, strong scrub and every once in a while she will towel me off in an invigorating fashion.

But here's where it gets weird. I was having lunch at Balthazar with some other ladies in my building. I was astounded that we were sat immediately. Per usual there would be a crowd surrounding the host stand and as is custom, one of the ladies slips the host a crisp, $100 bill to get a table. It was my turn this week to do so and we all looked at each other in confusion for being able to sit down upon arrival. I gingerly clutched the 100 not quite knowing where to put it. Ew. How repulsive to not be able to buy your way into a coveted table so as to gloat at the commoners waiting in the vestibule.

Then, I was very startled to see that there was a lunch special. A LUNCH SPECIAL at Balthazar. I mean--- how embarrassing to have to have a combo of salad lyonnaise, steamed mussells, and foie gras tortellini with a dessert included for $55. I mean, i would expect this nonsense during Restaurant Week, but this was December.

The world opened up to me. I left lunch that day determined to spend the leftover 100 I had and thought I would maybe go buy a hand towel from Tag Heuer Boutique with it, but I felt strange. My beautiful, perfect Soho seemed....sad. I noticed that men and women were walking around with half the amount of shopping bags. I saw fewer mercedes pulling up to store fronts to let out throngs of beautiful SoHo locals. I smacked into David Bowie while I was rounding a corner and he had an Au Bob Pain carry out bag. I was reeling with shock and when I thought things couldn't get anymore disheartening, I walked by a little pizza joint and saw America's Next Top Model, McKey serving up slices.

I burst through the door (which I would never have done otherwise) to make sure it was her. Oh, It was her allright, there was no Annie Leibovitz photo shoot happening--- it was McKey serving up slices from a brick oven wearing a ball gown smeared with marinara. I looked over and saw Yoanna taking down orders over the phone. It was too much. Much too much.

I instantly hailed a yellow cab, since I didn't have time to wait for my driver, sped home to the penthouse and immediately fired my hairwasher. Yes, I admit that instead of going down to the salon anymore I decided to hire my maid's cousin to start washing my hair because she does it for half the price of the woman downstairs....I mean, I need a little luxury in my life. Don't we all? But I panicked after seeing models and large pizzas in the same space. Those two things are not supposed to occur in nature under the same roof and now I know that something is wrong with the economy.

I am writing this entry from my anti-aging chamber as I decided this is probably the best place for me to be right now. I had not intended to induce the vitamin/nutrient filled coma for another few years but if SoHo is going to be a veritable wasteland, I do not want to be lucid. Until someone else figures out how to fix all of this, I am going to rest. Wake me up when the economy is back to normal.

10 comments:

Mo Diggs said...

Yeah times is tough. I had to fire my butler which meant he wasn't there to read this to me.

Chesslee CC said...

Mo, why did you fire me? Of course no one will be there to read this to you either... how I miss you!

Mo Diggs said...

I've learned how to read for myself. SOOOOO overrated.

Brooklyn VP said...

mo and chesslee, is my blog your new chat room?

Mo Diggs said...

[Mo has logged off. He can receive messages offline.]

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Anonymous said...

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